Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Christmas And Other Make-Work Projects.

God, it makes me mad. I feel obligated to help put up Christmas decorations because if I don't I further cement my reputation of "the useless sister." So hours go into putting up plush wall hangings, wooden toll-painted Santa figures, nativity scenes, and the tree. The damn tree. (Interesting side note: did you know that the common botanical name for the Christmas Tree is Catherinebane? True dat.)

One week later, we take it all down, carefully wrapping each item and turning it all into wasted space for the other 51 weeks of the year. So as to not seem like a total Bah Humbug, I do concede that sometimes enjoy revelling in the nostalgia of certain tree ornaments. But not enough to go through the time suck of decorating for Christmas.

Happily we don't murder a tree for the whole spectacle. Since we used to go to Newfoundland every year for Christmas, we didn't want a real tree dying and spontaneously combusting in our vacant home, so we always put up an artificial one. Since I never knew anything different, I don't miss having a real tree. And it makes me feel better that my family doesn't participate in the annual martyrdom of coniferous trees. (Yeah, I know - they're like chickens - bred to be killed.)

So, summing up, I spent too many hours doing things that I would later have to spend time un-doing. Next year, I'm going to dig a pit on December 23rd and on January 2nd, I'm going to fill it in. Same diff.


Holly said...

The annual Christmas tree slaughter is kind of a downer when you think about how crappy the atmosphere is. Every time I see a car going, loaded with a tree, I always think "Hey, that could be pre-breathing my air for me, you bastards!" I am glad you and yours don't participate in that.

Also, as I have no nostalgic associations with the smell of Christmas trees, I find that they reek. Kinda like cat pee, but not quite. People always think I am a hum bug for that.

Take care, and all the best for 2006.

mel said...

actually, I think it's more environmentally sound to use a real tree, because artificial ones take like, a bazillion* years to decompose in landfills. If I ever put up a tree (which is a lot of years off, if at all) I'd go for the real deal.

*figure is pretty much made up, but I think it's really is over 1000 years or something ridiculous like that.

Holly said...

How about neither? Or one in a pot that you can use every year?

I prefer sleeping in to celebrating, anyway.

Catherine said...

Good point, Mel - you're right. The artificial tree probably does leave a bigger ecological footprint than real trees. Holls is spot on - just use neither.

mel said...

my apartment hasn't seen a spot of decoration in the three years I've had one over the holidays. Unless if I move in with someone who gets excited by the season, I'm pretty sure I'll be a neither kind of person.